Januari 14, 2017
gavin: space invaders! it's an arcade classic where aliens invade earth. gavin: in the game, the aliens move completely in unison, in an extremely predictable pattern. gavin: now, surely knowing the pattern would give you a huge advantage. or would it?! aliens: yeeeeeaaaaaaahhhhh! gavin: in this very special episode of immersion, we've come to our rooster teeth alien defense station here at the first rtx australia convention. gavin: and this is mankind's last chance at survival. michael: what the hell is this? gavin: i'm a scientist now. michael: i leave for like two episodes and you're a scientist now?
gavin: i did all the science. look at the science. barbara: he's upgraded. michael: you've downgraded. gavin: alright. barbara: as you know, in space invaders, an alien army marches in unison, slowly making their way towards earth. barbara: our lab rats will man a gun turret. one pushing left and right, and the other aiming and firing. barbara: the alien army will be armed with a variety of projectiles. barbara: and if the alien army reaches our lab rats, humanity loses. gavin: lads, ready?
michael: ready to try with my new best teammate, ever. barbara: that's, that's cold.michael: not you. gavin: oh, it cuts me so deep. gavin: alright, so michael and ryan have seven lives. gavin: each successful hit from an alien will take off one life. gavin: so, uh, let's see how they do. michael: well. ryan: this is, uh, this is the best earth could do, huh? michael: don't we have tanks and shit?
ryan: nah, just nerf. michael: what's the strategy here? what, what's your plan ryan?ryan: uh ryan: i think we run and hide. barbara: alright guys, you ready? three, two, one, invade! michael: alright. jesus! ryan: alright. ryan: michael, would you hit something please?! michael: i'm trying! it's the gun, it's not me. i have, my controller's broken! ryan: i need you to kill somethin'!
barbara: they're so fucked. ryan: my goal is one. hey we got one! michael: i got one! ryan: alright! only a thousand more to go. michael: go, go, go! go to the right, go to the right. jesus, you're gonna kill me. ryan: this is really hard here. michael: i have, i gained weight for the movie, okay! they told me i needed to! ryan: jesus, man. michael: our defenses are going to shit, it's awful out here!ryan: if only we used something stronger than boxes!
michael: get the hell out of here! ryan: aww yeah, get 'em, we'll get them on low cover here. michael: ungh.ryan: there you go. michael: take that you yellow scum! michael: push, push ryan! push like you're pregnant! i need safety, get me behind the wall! ryan: i didn't take lamaze class, i don't know how! michael: oh, jesus. gavin: all their ammo's down. do you see that? have they noticed? ryan: have we got any bullets left?michael: oh, i'm running out of bullets, i'm running out of bullets!
ryan: the position, look out! woah!michael: i got one, we're gonna need to reload! ryan: this is our last base. michael: jesus christ! michael: where's the ammo?! ryan, it's back there!ryan: aw, shit!michael: the ammo's back there, go get it! michael: go push us back, pull us back! holy shit! ryan: dude, you're gonna have to get out and walk here a minute. this is really hard.michael: i'm not walking shit. michael: ryan!ryan: hold it in! michael: we have no defenses left!ryan: ah, incoming! michael: move, move, move!
ryan: get the pink, get the pink!michael: i got, ow, ow.ryan: oh. a direct hit. michael: *cough* *cough* ryan: and backing up.michael: wait i need ammo. gavin: they're actually not doing bad. they're about halfway through but the aliens are really speeding up. barbara: they gotta go faster too. michael: ah, i can't see.ryan: let me see. ah, it's locked up. michael: i can't see through the goggles. michael: oh my god, i'm not even pushing and i'm out of fucking breath. ryan: aw, pink is gettin' close.michael: let's go, let's go.
ryan: get pink!michael: i'm tryin'! michael: oh shit! i got some splash damage, i got some splash damage. michael: i'm gettin' my ass kicked. gavin would do a better job than this! ryan: bullshit! gavin couldn't move you an inch! michael: he'd be doing it like a teammate ryan. ryan: oh, that was a hit.michael: ohhhh.ryan: that was another hit. michael: my abdomen! *cough* *cough* ughhhh, unghhhh barbara: they're sure complaining a lot about water balloons. have they ever been to summer camp? michael: oh my godryan: can you see at all?
michael: it is slippery. no, that's why i'm not using the googles anymore. michael: but, i did it for earth.ryan: yeah. michael: alright. go, go , go , go , go, go , go!ryan: aim, fire earth! michael: alright, we're doin' good, we're doin' good. i'm, i, i, i. did i get one?ryan: i am shocked. michael: oh, i got 'em, i got 'em. ok. michael: this is, dude this is goin' well. this, this is actually workin' out!ryan: awww, the earth is doin' okay. michael: ohryan: aw, shit! ah, no. ah.michael: oh god, it went in my mouth! it went in my mouth! gavin: oh, in his face. barbara: it's like alien bukkake just happened all over michael.
ryan: can we just stay over here now? ryan: look, here's the thingmichael: paint tastes fuckin' disgusting. ryan: we'll give 'em chicago, nobody wants it anyway. michael: dude, i don't give a shit. ryan: whadda we got? michael: we got, uh, a lot of green shit in the gun.ryan: oh shit, they're goin' fast. michael: it's dripping. michael: alright, go, go, go, go, go, go, go!ryan: eat fire, earth. ryan: knock 'em out, knock 'em out! hoo!
barbara: ya know, i think they're doing too good of a job right now. gavin: they're gettin' through 'em.barbara: we need to stop 'em. gavin: release the mothership! gus: to victory, and earth! michael: aw, what the hell is that?ryan: holy shit! michael: what is that fuckin' freak?! look at it!ryan: ah, my eyes! michael: put some fuckin' clothes on. jesus! ryan: he's shooting at us too!michael: it's just everywhere! ryan: he's offensive to the face and the eyes.michael: he's got a ladle!
michael: oh, shit! ryan: didn't you do a movie about this?! michael: yes, and it, we were terrible! ryan: oh.michael: fuck, ryan. gavin: oh, and he's off the cart.barbara: michael! michael: go, go, go, go, go pushing, keep pushing.ryan: go, you're not on. gavin: oh, and again. now they're down to two, immediately. michael: fuck. oh god, oh god. the blue's so close, the blue's so close, the blue's so close. michael: go, go, go!ryan: ugggghhhhh.
michael: i'm trying, it's jammed! i'm not, it's always jammed! god dammit!ryan: make the counter crack! do anything! michael: the military fucked us! this equipment is faulty. michael: oh, shit!ryan: oh, shit! barbara: oh man, gus got them right in the face.gavin: oh! now, that's their final life and the aliens are entering the earths atmosphere. gavin: i can't believe how close this is actually.barbara: they have no more chances. michael: this is the choice we've made. we're gonna defend the earth or we're gonna die trying. michael: i am not, i'm not getting out of my seat!ryan: it's, stop complaining! gavin: they're taking too long to reload. they've gotta take out those last four aliens.barbara: oh, no. michael: come on, come on. get in there.ryan: oh, shit. i, the track is gone!
ryan: there's no track anymore.michael: the track is gone. ryan: i think this is it!michael: i think we're done for. gavin: this is literally their last chance. barbara: ooh. oh my god, they couldgavin: they have to shoot 'em now. michael: ungh. there's so many jammed in, there's like 19 bullets in the fucking chamber! michael: we're fucked! gavin: the gun is completely jammed, it's like he's wrestling with it.barbara: shoooot. michael: this is war, war is hell!ryan: come on man, you've gotta fire! barbara: throw the gun!michael: we're fucked, we're fucked ryan. michael: no, they're kicking our shield.ryan: it's over.
michael: nooooo!gavin: no, it's over.ryan: aw! barbara: so are we dead now technically?gavin: technically yea, we, we were there.barbara: oh. gavin: we were on earth, so uh, we're done for.barbara: so, does gus rule earth now? michael: ugh, god. michael: did i get any in my eye?ryan: i mean, like not right in the center of it. gavin: well guys, earth took an absolute pounding. but it was very close. what do you think the downfall was? michael: this. gavin: it did get gooped up pretty badly.michael: it got gooped so hard. gavin: what's fascinating to me is you had these walls,michael: yup.
gavin: you had this block, michael: yup.gavin: yet somehow your penis took the brunt of, look, stand up, stand, look at this. gavin: how did that, how did he get so messy?michael: it's just such a big target i think everyone just aimed for it. barbara: well, clearly you guys didn't do too well and earth is doomed now forever.gavin: you doomed us all. barbara: so, gus, congratulations. you guys are officially the winners. gus: thank you. i'd like to speak to my aliens, so get out of here.barbara: ok.gavin: let's get out of here. gus: so most of you sucked, four of you did good. so there's only one thing really left to do. and, uh, that's finish off the human race. gus: sorry guys. ryan: can i sign up for the alien team? gus, yeah, yeah. we had a good hr person.
ryan: oh cool, alright. uh, have fun man. michael: are you kidding me?ryan: you're fine. gus: finish him!
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